Ripped Heart


Sudden, unexpected, violent–
All that’s left, a gapping hole.
The magnificent tree that had been seeded
that had taken root
that had been growing beautifully
under tender loving care
unceremoniously uprooted.

By what? who? where? how? why?
In shock and reeling from injuries
can only stare.
Stare and stare at where it used to be
as the wounded heart bleeds.

Reaching out frantically–
Where is it?
Just a mistake. A wayward wind, maybe.
Wrecking unintentional havoc.
A trial to be overcome.
Re-plant the tree, quick!
Put it back where it was, fill up that hole, tis not too late.
It’ll recover, and be stronger from this.

The tree… is gone.
Twas not a wayward wind.
I see that now.
Twas a deliberate act.
To rip, to hack, to chop, to destroy.
There’s no hope left for it.

Well, maybe– start again?
Here’s a seed from the beloved tree.
Should I place it in the hole?
Start a new chapter of the same book?
It’ll be good–mistakes made with the previous tree won’t be repeated.
It’ll outshine it’s predecessor.

The seed’s… not growing.
It’s not receiving the love or care it needs–
or perhaps it was a bad seed from the start.
Bad trees bear bad fruits which give us…
dead seeds. Not worth the time.

The gapping hole stares back.
Blacker, bigger
each time you look.
The edges harden–or are they healing?
No, they turn black from poison.

The darkest, roughest parts
are those in contact with the roots of the missing tree.
Once full of life and joy,
now only death.

It’ll be a slow and painful
but necessary process
to weed out every single last tendril
deeply entrenched and entangled
in the soil of the heart.

Great care is required
to not cause more damage
to let the heart heal
to extricate
every
last
memory

and send it the way of the obliterated tree.

(How inconsiderate
to take the tree but leave the troublesome roots.
Leave it there to develop and flourish
else don’t even start to grow it at all.)

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My Rainbow Heart


My rainbow heart
Where have you gone?
I haven’t felt you
For so very long

I miss your laughter
I miss your smiles
I haven’t had that
For quite a while

I miss your prancing
Your joyful songs
Your silly banter
Your stringing along

I miss your optimism
Your idealistic hope
That all will be better
There’s no end of the rope

I miss your contentment
Your inner peace
Your love for the world
Your desire to please

I miss your appreciation
For the simple and small
To not hold grudges
To let go and trust all

My rainbow heart
Is that you hiding?
I think I see you;
You’re almost in reach.
My rainbow heart
I know you’re hurting
You don’t like pain
But pain, too, has lessons to teach.

Dear rainbow heart
Please come back stronger
Please don’t get tarnished
and come sooner, not later.

I need you.

 Other hearts: Black Heart and Pink Heart