Questions to Ask Yourself


If you are, then I'm happy for you.

or merely changed what you're running from?

If you don't trust yourself, you can't expect others to. And the basis of any human interaction and relationship is trust.

Lying to others is bad. But lying to yourself is far worse.

very, very much.

But if you've managed to do it, won't you teach me how?

I didn’t make these with the objective of posting them here, but was rather pleased with the results (yay more relatively successful attempts with watercolours) so I decided to share.

 

Branching Trees and Nature Parks


New ATCs! :D First and second experimenting with my newly bought paints and third reverting to my more familiar medium of colour pencils haha. I’m sorry they’re all blue. Maybe I’ll make more in all colours.

Shall accompany these nature-themed ATCs with some nature-themes good news: Coney Island, off Punggol in the north-west, will be home to Singapore’s ninth nature park!

A Nature Park is better (conservation wise) than a regular “Community Park” I suppose, but it’s not a Nature Reserve, so it probably doesn’t receive any proper protection. I’m slightly amused by this line, which is obviously supposed to make the place sound very natural and full of exciting wildlife: “Lush vegetation covers nearly 90 per cent of the island. Wildlife species that have been spotted there include the white-bellied sea eagle, a large bird with a considerable soaring range.” You can spot the white-bellied sea eagle in MacRitchie, no need to go all the way to Coney Island.

Not that it’s not exciting to see the white bellied sea eagle haha. But apparently you can also see “birds of prey such as the native grey-headed fish eagle, and jerdon’s baza, a rare migratory bird.” so that sounds pretty awesome! :)

My Rainbow Heart


My rainbow heart
Where have you gone?
I haven’t felt you
For so very long

I miss your laughter
I miss your smiles
I haven’t had that
For quite a while

I miss your prancing
Your joyful songs
Your silly banter
Your stringing along

I miss your optimism
Your idealistic hope
That all will be better
There’s no end of the rope

I miss your contentment
Your inner peace
Your love for the world
Your desire to please

I miss your appreciation
For the simple and small
To not hold grudges
To let go and trust all

My rainbow heart
Is that you hiding?
I think I see you;
You’re almost in reach.
My rainbow heart
I know you’re hurting
You don’t like pain
But pain, too, has lessons to teach.

Dear rainbow heart
Please come back stronger
Please don’t get tarnished
and come sooner, not later.

I need you.

 Other hearts: Black Heart and Pink Heart

Unconditional Love


I love you
No matter what you say or do.
I love you
Even if you don’t want to receive it.

Your love is not mine to have,
not mine to demand or pled or beg for.
Your attentions are not mine to vie for
to capture and hold down.
Your actions aren’t mine to control,
Your decisions aren’t mine to make.
Even your heart was never mine,
and you were never mine either.

These things aren’t for possessing.
These things can’t be possessed.
If you feel otherwise, it is but an illusion,
That will be shattered eventually.

These things,
They are meant for giving.

Like a song sung,
A poem, or dance,
Or a breeze felt,
Or even the sun on your skin.
Given freely
For you to receive, enjoy,
appreciate, cherish

but not to possess.

My love is mine to give
And I hope I’ll give it freely
My love is mine to give
and you can’t take that away from me.

Venom


Black Heart ATC

Venomous thoughts and poisonous words;
Whom do they prick? Who do they hurt?

“All of you can go fuck yourselves!”
I’m sick of being shot down.
I hate you, I think to myself,
Black anger swirls round and round.

An armour of self protection
from the crap the world can dish out.
Or a more sinister infection?
Could you say, without a doubt?

Stone walls built around you heart
Shield attacks of knives and arrows.
They keep out, keep in or keep apart.
Suffocate prisoners in the gallows.

In my anger,
black venom flows
tendrils worming
into deeper hold

Thorns protruding
A slow rage burns
Which direction?
Yet to learn.

A hardened heart’s no good for joy,
or happiness, laughter or smiles
Soften your heart, that’s the right ploy
Choose love, it’ll be worthwhile.

Yet how many times can you keep turning
the other cheek before it gets sore?
How many times can you keep enduring
getting stabbed and shot once more?

With desire to hurt, hate lashes out
Being angy makes me feel better
But should I be crying “demons, out!”
Rather than indulge in this behaviour?

Venomous wallowing in poisonous muck
Right now I can’t seem to help but do.
In letting them fester, breed and grow
Do I hurt me more than you?